Heros and Monsters
Reflections of a Reporter

I recall as a child waking up in the middle of the night and fearing some unknown, unnamed, indescribable creature that lurked under my bed or perhaps, in my bedroom closet. Of course, that monster never did materialize to do harm to me. I had parents whose bed I ran to and who through their love and care for me, brought me comfort and reassurance as I crawled into bed with them. Riley Ann Sawyers was not that fortunate.

This past week I reported on the capital murder trial of Kimberly Dawn Trenor, whose monstrous acts and indifference to the well being of her own child sparked the memories of my childhood fears. The trial brought to mind my parents and their ability to calm and alieviate my fear, not instill fear in me. Throughout the trial I looked for answers as to how a mother could participate in such horrendous acts against her own flesh and blood. I never received those answers that I was hoping for; I'm not sure anyone present at the trial received them either. There were times during the testimony of different witness when Ms. Trenor became visibly upset, cried and held her head downward, avoiding eyecontact with both witnesses and the viewing of autopsy photos. I wanted to believe those were signs of remorse, an outward display that the defendant knew she was wrong for her actions that fateful evening Riley Ann died. I do however, remain unsure of that remorse. I wonder if the emotions displayed by the defendant were indeed signs of remorse or were they displays of embarrasment that her actions were brought to light; or  were they the mainfestation of fear, wondering what fate the jury's decision would bring to her. At best, I can only speculate.

There were heroes in the courtroom too, this past week. No, they didn't wear colorful spandex costumes and they didn't don capes. Some wore suits, some wore law enforcment uniforms; others wore everyday clothing, and one wore a judicial robe. Some came forth to tell the truth, some to listen to the truth and one to preside over the trial. They were men and women who lived this case and no doubt carried a tremendous weight in seeking justice for young Riley. Heroes all. I'm sure young Riley Ann Sawyers thinks so.

It was extremely difficult to view the smiling photograph of such a little person without remembering my son at that age. Sure, there were times he was rambuncious and I am equally as sure, there were times when I could have been more patient. Children need discipline, but they require the kind of discipline carefully adminstered out of love; not discipline adminstered to the point of death.

The death of Riley Ann Sawyers and the trial of her mother, has made me ever mindful that both heroes and monsters walk among us.

Joan Meidam covered the Kimberly Trenor murder trial from start to finish.  She was in the courtroom all day, everyday, during all the testimony.  This was her first murder trial assignment.
Joan Meidam may be reached at: jmediam@thepolicenews.net